Do you want to know how to reset and kick start your mindset? Do you doubt yourself, lack confidence and conviction in your life? Take these simple steps and understand how your actions and thoughts affect your mindset.
First steps to changing your mindset
It is important that you understand that your thoughts affect your mindset. Even the words you use everyday will reflect in your mindset.
I can’t do this because …..
This is impossible because …
I will never be like that ….
Before you have even started, you have already planted that seed of self doubt into your mind. Consider rephrasing to;
I will achieve this by ….
When I achieve this I will be …..
How can i achieve this ……
Ban the phrase I can't from your mind
To start, this may be hard to do. Mainly because you have trained yourself to be negative and place barriers in your mind before you have given yourself a chance. By changing these simple words you can gradually change your mindset.
I have banned this phase from my home for myself and my son Nicholas. I don’t want him to place barriers before he has even started his journey in life.
Watch and observe the changes in your life by making these simple steps. This will not happen overnight, but you can start today.
Think and reflect to change your mindset
Everything that you do, say and people you surround yourself with will have an effect on your mindset. Observe and reflect on your actions. Take time out to do this, just 10-15 minutes to reflect on your actions and thoughts through the day.
Think about how these thoughts have made you feel and try to understand why they make you feel the way they do.
Remember, thoughts create feelings, which then lead to action.
Stop saying no and remove your mindset barrier
How many times did your parents tell you that you could not have something, because they could not afford it. That money does not grow on trees.
Without realising it, as we move into adulthood we already have the mindset that we cannot afford something. Our brain has already been trained from an early age to place barriers, which affects our mindset.
I am not placing all the blame at our parents doors, they did not do this on purpose. They were being honest, but this has been ingrained into our subconscious.
It is time to remove that barrier in yourself. If you have children, you do not want them to grow up with these barriers as well.
How to change the word no to a positive
These are just a few simple steps that you need to take.
Negative I can’t afford this …..
Positive How I will save for this …….
When my son is asking for something, I do not say no to him. I ask him how can he save for that favourite toy. Not only is this removing that barrier in his mindset, it is also encouraging him to understand money.
Forgive yourself and improve your mindset
A major mindset is being able to forgive yourself for past actions or failures in your life. Everybody has had something in their life that has placed a barrier in their minds. This stops them from moving forward.
It is important to forgive yourself, as most probably these actions were not due to your own actions.
How to forgive past actions
Instead of dwelling on your past failures or actions, learn to forgive yourself. The easiest way to do this in writing a letter to yourself for your past actions or mistakes.
This may seem and feel silly, but you are stating an intent to make amends. Saying it is okay that you failed but you are forgiving yourself.
Remember, forgive yourself when nobody else will
Writing a letter to the past your to forgive yourself
The first section of the letter needs to state what you are forgiving. This may make you feel silly, or there may be some resistance. This is because you do not want to face your past. This is the only way you can overcome your past.
It has to come from your heart. Take your time, as this is personal to you. Imagine yourself talking to a friend and offering them advice. Give yourself compassion in your letter like you would your friend.
State clearing that you are sorry, and the reason why you are sorry. Do not be negative about yourself or try to justify your actions. Be honest about how you felt and how this has affected you, (angry, hurt, sad, ashamed).
Remember, this is for you only.
You will feel a shift in your subconscious, with this simple step to forgiving yourself.
Importance of forgiving others
Not only is it important to forgive yourself, it is also important to forgive others.
Turn a negative into a positive
We all carry guilt or negative thoughts that affects our mindset. Which then makes us feel a failure. But we love to blame others for our failures.
It is time to accept the failure yourself and stop blaming others. Accept the responsibility, situation and the outcome. If the failure is not all your fault, accept partial responsibility.
Only you can make yourself feel negativity, nobody else. Understand the power of positive thinking, banish the negative thoughts and thinking about what you want.
Instead of dwelling on the negative, twist it and turn into a positive. You can do this by saying to yourself
‘that’s good because …..’
Make the most out of a situation
If an event or idea has not had the outcome you expected, don’t just give up. It is important that you celebrate your failures and use them as a stepping stone.
By viewing this failure as a negative, your are intentionally increasing your chance of future failures. Accept this failure in a positive way, and celebrate. Treat yourself to that cup of coffee or ice cream, celebrate and welcome this failure.
By accepting this failure you are reversing your intent. You are celebrating but accepting that this is just a stepping stone to your success.
Look your failures in the eye
It is important that you look your failures in the eye. As out of failure becomes success.
Don’t give up on your future dreams and hopes. Be positive, when ever you feel negative reverse the meaning, and turn into a positive.
No matter how hard this may be, try it and see the change in your mindset.
Leave jealousy to others
How often do you envy others and allow that jealousy to seep into your mind. Creating a bitter and resentful feeling.
Whether it relates to a promotion at work or seeing another person driving your dream car. It does not matter, the feeling will grow if you allow it to.
Be pleased for them and forgive yourself as it is not you. Don’t allow the envy to stop your from being grateful for what you have.
Ask yourself what they did to get this promotion or an amazing car. How can you do this and set yourself tasks and goals so one day this can be you.
Mindset is very important, as with the stress of everyday life such as work, money and emotional problems. It can feel and seem impossible to see yourself out of a situation.
Always look for the positive angle on every situation, no matter how this makes your feel. Remove the negative aspect and replace with joy and actually feel that joy. Just don’t accept situations as they are, dig deeper and work to find ways to improve them.
Most importantly be grateful for what you have today. Find the joy in your life, surroundings, friends and family. Appreciate your health and the minor things in your life.
With accepting your situation and taking that time to enjoy and love, you will change your mindset. Gradually your perspective on life will change and you invite the good into your life.